So the most interesting thing that has happened around here lately is taking a roadtrip to Vegas to get married (yes, I am a walking stereotype). The two main things this trip told me were:

1. Getting married in Vegas is so easy and cheap I don't know why more people don't do it. NO WEDDING PLANNING.
2. You shouldn't attempt to drive 1,200 miles in two days.

Regarding the latter, people were telling me how big the Nevada desert was and I was like "Hahaha. I am AUSTRALIAN. We are like 90% abandoned desert! America has hundreds of millions of people! How big and deserted can your deserts be?"

(It's got those folds there because I scanned it in from an Australian newspaper)


In other news, is anyone ever going to event a new format of movie trailer that isn’t 'really quick cuts that slowly speed up as the music reaches a dramatic crescendo, until gradually it's just flashing one-second shots to make the movie look really exciting, and then sudden silence and blackness followed by a loud dramatic last shot'? It’s getting kind of boring.

Also, this bugs me so much about post-apocalyptic epics: the men always look like you’d expect them to look cleanliness-wise, but the women are still perfectly groomed. I guess to pluck your eyebrows all you really need is a Swiss army knife and some downtime, but where are they getting all the shampoo and blowdryers?

Ultra-Realistic Modern Warfare Game Features Awaiting Orders, Repairing Trucks

(via mavx )

It's somehow even better than this article.

And of course:

This was going to be a post about my roadtrip to Nevada, with an aside about how I was disappointed about how the landscape around Area 51 looked completely different than it does in one of my all-time favorite movies, Independence Day.


But then I decided to make the whole post about Independence Day instead.

Independence Day is either one of the last, or the last, of the self-confident American blockbusters. I am trying to think of one that was produced after this, but I can't. It probably has to do with appealing to international audiences or something, but it sucks.The fact that the writer/director, Roland Emmerich, went on to make The Day After Tomorrow says a lot about the evolution of Hollywood ideas.

But even leaving that fact aside, this movie is a forgotten nerd goldmine. I know because I have shown it many times to fellow nerds, who remember it only vaguely as a mid-nineties blockbuster, and who then react with delight as they realize how many obscure sci-fi actors the movie features. Obviously, there is Jeff Goldblum in the unique role of The Anti-Technology Scientist Who Nobody Listens To. But there's also President Roslyn, Jayne from Firefly, and BRENT SPINER. And that's just half of them!

Plus, it has a scene where Will Smith punches an alien in the face, knocking it out, and says "Welcome to Earth."


( A side effect of watching the movie this many times is that you start to think too deeply about a plotline that was obviously designed for audiences to watch only once while being distracted by the cool explosions and stuff. )

So for now, here's a picture of WWII Italian resistance fighters, sent in by a kindly commenter!

It's a late night edition, but boy do I have an excuse. Let's just say I have now driven across more of the Nevada desert than most Americans ever will.

Because most Americans are sensible.

For good this time! In fact, I'm pretty much unable to leave the US at all right now, so nobody do anything interesting in another country for the next year or so.

It's still all sinking in, really.

I will probably be sparse for the next week or so because I'm traveling. With the exception of possibly posting sparkly American-themed blingees.

I hope everyone had a wonderful weekend!

There have been all these studies on the effects of violence on television, but I have never heard of any interest in the effects of other TV characteristics. Like the underappreciated TV trope that I was talking about in a previous entry that I can't find now, in which any character who expresses joy or hope at an upcoming event is immediately punished by a cruel television god because it's more tragic and dramatic that way.

If a person gets a large amount of their widespread social interaction/instruction from television and movies, does this have any influence on them? Like, if a television character is shown gushing about her upcoming perfect wedding, how often is it that the wedding will actually go off without a hitch? And how many fictional weddings does the average person see on TV, compared with the number of weddings they experience and attend in real life?

It is a bit like the long-running joke me and some friends have about how dudes stationed in the Middle East are forbidden to ever talk about their fiancées or to show anyone pictures of them, because anyone who does this will immediately get tragically killed.

And I wonder if there is like, a widespread-but-silent psychological phenomenon of police officers developing low-level anxiety disorders in the weeks leading up to their retirement.

Please digg! I'm actually kind of proud of this one, because it's the first Cracked thing I've done that doesn't feature extensive gay jokes or crude references to genitalia.

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

ETA: Front page of digg! Yay! And yes, that Jesus one totally deserves to beat me.

Nothing ever happens on the show! Nothing! But I can't stop!

I don’t get people who watch it and then make comments like "Oh, it was so horrible/weird/wonderful/whatever back then!" or the like. Um, it’s a drama show, not a hidden camera documentary, people. I mean, imagine humankind in 50 years watching Grey’s Anatomy and taking that as a snapshot of what life was like in whatever this decade is called. "Wow, everyone sure was skinny and culturally harmonious! And they sure did sleep with a lot of people at work!" And that show was made without a 50-year gap.

Anyway. I know the internet is in love with Christina Hendricks*, but come on:

By far the hottest chick on the show.


* Although, one of my favorite bits so far is that really subtle scene where Joan goes home and starts rubbing at the spot on her skin where her bra strap was. I admire a TV show that can show so much in so little.

So, I didn't actually hang around waiting for the antibiotics on Saturday. Not long after I posted I decided to be proactive about the whole thing and walk across to the emergency room (there's a hospital opposite my place, which is convenient.) They took a look at me and admitted me on the spot. I learned a few things from my hospital experience:

• ( Morphine actually isn't cool. )
  

Anyway, all of that is pretty much inconsequential, because I JUST GOT MY VISA. YAY. DRINKS AND AMERICAN FLAG PIE ALL AROUND.

Okay, I got almost halfway through the most recent episode of Supernatural and then I had to turn it off. Without being spoilery, can someone who has seen the episode tell me ( mild spoilers )

Because it's still Monday somewhere in the world.

Because I'm sure most of you are in better standing with God than I am :) Would you mind saying a quick prayer that these antibiotics kick in within the next 18 hours or so so that I don't have to go to hospital? It's only a minor procedure I'm facing and I'm not in any real danger healthwise, but it could be a physical and financial inconvenience I really don't need right at this moment.

Thanks! In return, I give you a right-wing kitty:


(yes, she dragged those books off the shelf herself)

There is an antique store in Seattle that sells vintage magazines for around $5-11, depending not so much on how old or rare they are as how much porn is inside. Don't ask me, I'm not a Seattle antique person. Anyway, I decided this was the best thing ever, but luckily I didn't have too much cash on me, so I only bought a couple:




( ROMANCE. And CUBA )

And there's no possible way to segue into this, but to save myself posting twice...

( sephira's wacky first-time experience with creepy sleep paralysis )